For all intents and purposes, there is no you. You, as most people understand the term, do not exist. Whatever you think you are is merely a fabrication, a revolving door of fragmentary selves cut off from the essence.
. . .
First, let us define it. Metanoia is change of heart, change of mind, spiritual conversion, repentance, correction, experiencing a psychological breakdown followed by a re-building. Clearly, it’s a potent word. Dangerous too… not only in the pursuit of metanoia but in its absence.
On a number of occasions, I’ve talked about how important it is to get out of your own way. Just as we’ve also discussed the ego and how it often goes overboard. Self-justification goes far and runs deep with a strong identity. Knowing who you are is an important piece of the puzzle. Satanists and those following the Left Hand Path usually pride themselves on having a rigid and concrete vision of themselves. But is that really a good thing? How does identity differ from identification? Identification relates to the mechanics of life which we get caught up in day to day. Identity refers to the mechanics of who we are. From that perspective, we can see that identity is an insidious form of identification. We take who we are for granted and accept that it is our identity which needs to Awaken. This could not be further from the truth!
Identity is not essence. Identity is not who we truly are. Identity is that layer just below the surface which does not switch masks like the layer above, but is itself the ultimate mask! Let me give you an example. Visualize a sucker or lollipop. Can you picture it in your mind? Ok, that’s us.
A sucker has a wrapper over the top of it which protects it from the world. That wrapper represents all our many ‘I’s or masks which we involuntarily put on, take off, and put on again. They change so easily that oftentimes we never notice the various surface aspects of ourselves are trading places with each other. When the red wrapper is on our sucker then we act one way. When the blue wrapper is on our sucker, we act another.
Fourth Way practitioners, those students who belong to a 4th Way school such as the Cult of Cthulhu, have learned about the wrapper… the competing ‘I’s which take control of the sucker as they wish. Beneath all those wrappers is the sucker itself. It’s hard, sweet, and shiny. Very alluring, very tasty! This is our identity – who we think we are. However, this is only the next layer. Little do Cultists realize that this is also a false self. Sure, it is a bit more “real” or substantial than the wrapper because it’s less transitory. That shell almost never moves. It actually believes that it’s the end all, be all… the real deal. Yet, this is not the whole story.
Our identity dictates our beliefs which dictates our decisions which dictates our behavior. Identity is actually the greatest mask of them all because it is always in place and giving orders! Since it is never removed, Fourth Way students assume that is where essence lies. Not by a long shot! We are the way we are because that’s just the way we are. Change, the kind of change I’m talking about – metanoia – can only be achieved if we realize that identity itself must be overcome. That means a re-evaluation of everything we are. Such metanoia can alter beliefs, decisions, and behavior.
The third layer is the small chewy center below the candy shell. It’s extremely difficult to see as the sucker is virtually opaque… even if one can remove the wrapper. But if you look close, then you will see it. The core down deep, below the immovable mask. Self study and super efforts make the sucker semi-transparent. So what is it? This soft innermost self is real, malleable, and even quite vulnerable… which is one reason why a candy shell and wrapper exist in the first place. The most effective work results from tapping into the small chewy center. Aim to Awaken essence, not the false outer layers. I say again, identity is not essence – identity obscures essence!
If identity is the enemy, then how shall it be destroyed? An excellent question! By not doing what we ordinarily do. By going beyond our everyday mode of operating. Re-programing! Engage the world in a new way, become a new being, cleanse oneself in the green slime of the void. See things differently. Use new language. Meet new people. Try new hobbies. Watch something you normally wouldn’t. Do something you normally wouldn’t… something completely out of character. Visit a foreign land. Let go of your issues. Release old grievances. Read strange books. Laugh at yourself. Try to focus on the illusions all around us and inside us. The false self is all we ever know, so break out of your shell. Become an unfamiliar person. Use your individuality to surprise those who know you best. Revel in that which is opposite to your usual personality. Do some soul searching in order to come up with ways you can utterly change who you are for the better. Hey, as long as you’re going to become different… might as well be an improvement on the old model, right?
I hope the sucker illustration drove my point home. Since you’ve been made aware of this new “terror of the situation” I believe you understand that action must be taken. For those who are brand-new to this system, brought to the west by Gurdjieff and then spread throughout the world by his disciples such as Ouspensky, it might not seem like a shock. However, those who have been intimately involved in The Work need to come to terms with the fact that their struggles have been continually stymied by adherence to a machine lurking below the mechanical facade we’ve all been struggling to override. You wonder why Crystallization hasn’t taken place? It’s probably because you haven’t broken through your identity yet. Intuitively, I’ve realized the hideous truth and have acted upon it for some time. Tonight, I reveal the details of self-mastery which might just lead you to Godhood. Yes, now you know almost all my secrets. This is the time for metanoia if ever there was one. Make it happen, my brothers and sisters!
It would most likely take years for a 4th Way practitioner to fully grasp the enormity of this distinction on his own… without the benefit of a teacher. This is why I recommend finding a Master, like myself, who is willing and able to guide students through the perilous labyrinth of esotericism. Those interested in Awakening should consider joining the Cult of Cthulhu.
Venger As’Nas Satanis
Cult of Cthulhu
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